I went to the Ranch during the last week of July, where I participated in an experiential seminar that helped me to transform my being and freed some buried trauma. Raptorman left Barstow and was back in Sacramento with Jimmy, chasing Janeway, and they were back on the streets. He put together a demo of our technology. It featured images of broken Barstow and old school computers from the 70’s. It featured a Nine Inch Nails soundtrack and while it was technically cool, it was quite dark. It felt like I was peering into a dark part of Raptorman’s mind. I called him on Monday morning, and experienced some of his darkness and fear from whatever he was going through on the streets. I started questioning whether it was the right decision to continue working with him, because the darkness scared me.
That afternoon, I walked up to a giant oak tree at the Ranch, and placed my hand on it, “I love you Grandfather Tree.” I sat under it, and as soon as I sat down, there was a large cracking sound. I continued to sit with my back against its trunk, and meditated for about ten minutes, feeling the spirit of the tree and talking to it. It responded with cracking and popping sounds… I found it odd, however, I didn’t really think much of it.
The class went back into the lecture hall inside the main building near the tree, and thirty minutes later, there was a large crash that shook the building, and the instructor says “Well, sounds like the tree went down.” When we went back outside, the tree had split in half, one of the trunks split and fell on the building. At first, I thought maybe it was a warning from the universe about working with Raptorman building AI, and the darkness that we could unleash on the world with it.
A crew started chainsawing and cleaning off the remnants of the fallen trunk throughout the week. As the week went on, and I healed some trauma through the experiential work, when I walked past the tree day by day, I realized that the Grandfather Tree had absorbed darkness from me (and also from Raptorman through my link to him?), dispersed it through the dead trunk and released the darkness.
That Thursday, Grandfather Tree‘s debris was fully cleaned up, which was the same day I had a huge transformative breakthrough at the seminar and an experience of true love with a Unicorn.
I decided at the end of the week to open source parts of the software we were building and to send Spliff and Jimmy $1,500/month so they could have a roof over their heads. They moved into a motel in Chinatown and the project lived on.
I arrived home, and when I looked in my backyard, the tree in my backyard also had split in half. Prior to my trip to the Ranch, my wife was in a place of severe darkness and depression, and I was sleeping in the guest room. As soon as I returned, her eyes were shining with love and she said “I love you again.” I asked her what happened with the tree in the backyard, and she said “I don’t know. It just fell down on Friday.”
Both trees survived and were saved. Every time we blaze in the backyard, the Backyard Tree is there, linked to the spirit of the Grandfather Tree, watching over us with love.